How to build confidence and self-esteem in teenagers?

Boarding schools help build confidence and self-esteem in teenagers by offering them space to self-reflect, explore their strong and weak points, and address the root cause of lack of self-confidence and low self-esteem. Teenagers often disregard their experiences and ignore the impact of those experiences on their current personality. Lack of confidence and self-esteem can lead to a secluded personality and social anxiety, which does not help students achieve their career goals. Teachers and parents must work actively to foster confidence and self-esteem in students and encourage them to build themselves. Let us learn more about how to build confidence and self-esteem.

What causes a lack of confidence?

Students often face lots of challenges during their learning course. One of the most common challenges students face is low self-confidence. Confidence is a sense of trust and belief that you can perform well and achieve great endeavours. Many students feel nervous and treat their lack of self-confidence as their failure, but they must realise that school is the powerhouse of learning through all failures. Effective communication skills in students help them to associate with peers and build their confidence. But before delving into it, let us learn more about the reasons for the lack of confidence in students.

1. Negative experiences– Students undergo a lot of experiences while studying at boarding schools, some of which are positive and some negative. It is normal for students to feel demotivated by negative experiences such as failures, setbacks or criticism. It instils self-doubt and impacts students’ confidence in upcoming endeavours.
2. Social anxiety– Not all students are extroverts; some are anxious about being in social situations and have a fear of judgment. Social anxiety prevents students from taking part in gatherings and conversations, making them appear as someone with low self-confidence. 
3. Lack of motivation– Very often, peers, teachers and parents give negative feedback to students on their shortcomings and criticise them but fail to appreciate and motivate students on their achievements. Students are bound to feel low and nervous as they do not have a sense of achievement that can garner confidence.
4. Unhealthy competition– Comparison mainly serves as a demotivating factor for students. The constant comparison regarding academic achievements, looks, and knowledge makes students feel inadequate. Unrealistic standards set by society and the incapability to match them foster a sense of low confidence in students.
5. Fear of failure– Life is all about taking risks, and the fear of failure or judgement comes in the way of trying new things. Students hesitate to pursue new opportunities due to fear of failure, which prevents them from exploring their full potential.

Reasons for low self-esteem

Self-esteem is defined as one’s confidence in their worth, abilities, and values. Confidence and self-esteem are two important qualities in a teenager. Students develop a sense of low self-esteem for various reasons. Let us learn more about the causes of low esteem in students.

1. Failure and setbacks– The early ages of a student’s life deeply impact them, and the experiences give birth to traumas and create a sense of low self-worth. Repeated failures or setbacks can diminish self-esteem in teenagers, keeping students away from pursuing their dreams.
2. Bullying and rejections– Social rejection and mockery suffered due to bullying have a lasting impact on teenagers. It leads to cutting off peer interaction and a rise in social anxiety. Disconnecting from society and people nurtures low self-esteem, which does not disappear unless addressed.
3. Parental influence– Teenagers look up to their parents for validation and encouragement. Students who do not have their parents around or are prone to getting criticised by them often feel that they are suitable for nothing. Parental involvement in student life is necessary to boost confidence and self-esteem in teenagers.
4. Self-perception– It is common for teenagers to belittle themselves by comparing themselves to others or due to past experiences. Negative self-perception can contribute to low self-esteem and prevent students from self-reflection and exploring their potential. 

Therefore, teenagers must work on improving their confidence and self-esteem for a brighter future. Let us learn more about how to build confidence and self-esteem in teenagers.

Steps for building confidence and self-esteem in teenagers

With the collective efforts of parents, mentors and peers, teenagers can work on improving self-esteem and confidence. Here is what you can do to boost confidence and self-esteem.

1. Encourage positive self-talk– Negative overthinking is the root cause of a lack of self-esteem and confidence. Parents, teachers, and peers must encourage teenagers to spend some time addressing and countering all negative thoughts. This can be instead replaced with self-reflection and positive affirmation.
2. Setting realistic goals– Hyper-realistic setting of goals must be avoided; instead, encourage the teenager to make bite-sized and manageable goals. By completing realistic goals, teenagers get a sense of satisfaction, motivation, and accomplishment. School counselors help students in setting doable goals and encourage their career planning.
3. Offering emotional support– Students often feel low and have a sense of existential crisis. Teenagers must be motivated, encouraged and validated at all the low phases in their lives. Parents, teachers and peers can foster positivity by creating an open and supportive environment where teenagers feel free to express themselves.
4. Providing constructive criticism– Feedback is essential for teenagers, but framing the feedback positively is crucial to encourage them to do better. Instead of criticising teenagers for their mistakes, provide constructive feedback where students do not feel like they are being judged or demeaned for their flaws.
5. Self-exploration– Apart from others working to boost confidence and self-esteem in teenagers, it is also the responsibility of the teenagers to have a positive attitude toward themselves. Through self-reflection and analysis, teenagers must try to understand their setbacks and work on improving them. It is in your hands to be confident and have self-esteem.

How do boarding schools promote confidence and self-esteem in a teenager?

Residential schools in India promote confidence and self-esteem in teenagers in various ways.

1. Disciplined environment– Private boarding schools offer a structured and disciplined environment to impose an anti-ragging zone. Teachers encourage students to discuss any indisciplined or unethical act in school. The aim is to keep students from any experience that can push them to have low self-confidence and self-esteem.
2. Diverse learning opportunities– Academic boarding schools are renowned for offering an extensive range of academic and extracurricular activities. Students are given a platform for self-discovery and developing their talents. Students will build their confidence and esteem only by knowing their true potential and excelling in it.
3. Social interaction– Life at boarding school is about living with peers, mentors and staff and attaining knowledge. Living in a close-knit community encourages social interaction and the development of interpersonal skills. Teenagers nurture their sense of belonging and self-worth by building positive relationships with peers and mentors.
4. Leadership opportunities– Group activities, clubs, events and functions are where boarding school students can showcase their leadership skills. It helps foster a sense of responsibility and accomplishment, thereby boosting confidence and self-esteem in teenagers.
5. Cultural exposure– The cultural diversity at Indian boarding schools provides opportunities for students to interact with peers from different backgrounds. It helps build social skills as students interact and respect multiple perspectives and diverse opinions. In this process, they learn about themselves and work on their confidence. 
6. Critical thinking– Residential schools in India help polish students’ critical thinking skills, allowing them to make sound decisions. Ethics in education serves as a moral anchor for students based on which they make decisions and solve problems. Proper decision-making and tackling the repercussions easily allow students to build self-confidence and self-worth.

These are a few ways boarding schools can boost confidence and self-esteem in teenagers and prepare them for a brighter future.

SKV is a female boarding school in Gwalior, affiliated with the CBSE board and offers world-class learning to students from class VI onwards. We are dedicated to providing progressive education to nurture students into independent, career-oriented individuals.